All Geeked Out

Yesterday was Star Wars day!  Many of you know of my love for Star Wars, and I think you all know of my love for puns.  It was the perfect day for those two loves to combine!  I could walk around and say “May the 4th be with you!” to people!  Total nerd heaven!

Today, I have a meeting about the trip the college is putting on for the NRA Food Show in Chicago.  I have bought my pass to the show, and I’ve expressed interest in going.  But, now that it’s time to turn in some money, I’m not so sure.  The guy that I had been kind of seeing is going.  He dumped me a few weeks back, and I’m not sure I want to spend that much time in a vehicle/hotel/convention hall with him.  There’s too much drama.  He’s the cause of about 99 percent of the drama surrounding the two of us.  He doesn’t know when to keep his mouth shut and even shows his one friend my text messages.  I haven’t really been talking to him because I don’t trust him not to go running to other people right away.  Burned once, never again.

I’m also thinking of staying home because I kind of can’t afford to go.  I have a little bit of money in the bank (enough to cover the trip), and I get paid for my one-day-a-week job every two weeks, but I had to give my entire tax refund check to my lawyer for the divorce.  It was a painful, panic-attack-inducing day.  To basically drain my entire checking account in one fell swoop and not even get anything material to take home with me was dizzying.  I know it’s a necessary expense, but with how little I make and how expensive gas is right now, it’s sickening that something I didn’t want and the paperwork I didn’t want to file are continuing to cost me everything.

All that said, as my friend Emily reminded me, I have my health, and I have good friends and a good family, all of whom are healthy.  That’s really what’s important.  Not the rest of the bullshit.  It’s hard to put the drama at school and my painful divorce situation out of my head some days, but I have to keep reminding myself of the important things.  And it helps to demand hugs of people.